Go Fish
by fangirl-with-a-tennant-fetish
Summary: The gang gets informed they're getting a new member. Nathan sees this as a chance to hook up with the new girl, but things take a turn for the weird when, after a botched date, Nathan wakes up not quite feeling like himself. (Reviews are welcome! Thanks! :D )
1. Chapter 1

The probation worker, Shaun, being his usual disinterested self, entered the hall where the Misfits were hanging out. Rather than being angry at the crew for just leaning against their mops instead of cleaning, he simply didn't care.

"I have an announcement." He told them with an incredible lack of enthusiasm. "You're getting a new member of your _contributions to society _team, which I see you're all doing a bang-up job at. So, you know, play nice. Yeah? She'll be out after she gets on that shit orange jumpsuit. Alright. I told ya lot. Get moppin'."

With that he sauntered away back to the office.

The group collectively groaned and began mopping the floor.

All except Nathan who remained chilling on a chair.

"Ya hear that? We're getting a new member, guys!" He smiled.

"Yupiee." Alisha rolled her eyes.

"Will you help us?" Kelly asked.

"And wreck these perfect cuticles? I'd rather eat a live worm dipped in bacon-grease." He replied "hey, I should pitch that to McDonalds."

"Wanker." Kelly sighed.

"What? We won't tell the pubic what it _really _is. Obviously. Just like the McNugget. I'm sure if we deep-fry it, it'll taste decent. Hell, people'll eat any shit these days. We'll call it the McSurpriseFry." He nodded.

"Would you shut up and work? You're only interested in this new member 'cause she's a girl." Curtis complained.

"Moi? Wow, buddy. Them's harsh words. But, entirely correct. I'm gettin' nowhere with these broads. Maybe this is my chance to finally get some with someone in this group. The thought of getting' laid in this jumpsuit, oo—"

"Would you stop?" Alishasaid.

"Stop rubbing one out into a sock every night and finally feel the gentle touch of a new big-tittied member of the group?" Nathan sighed, "God, I hope so."

"How do you know she has big…?" Simon stammered.

He glared at the teen, "Well, Barry. I don't. But a man can dream. Oh, yes. A man can dream."

"Hey, Dream-boy. Here's your lady of the night now." Curtis told him as the group turned to face their new member.

Her hair was long and wavy but her brunette colour did nothing for her fair skin. If anything, it made her skin seem even paler. The thing that threw the group off was her physical appearance. She was a size 26 in UK sizes (or a 22 in US) but, in her defense she was fairly proportioned. With her heaviest bits being her hips and chest, it gave her somewhat of an hourglass shape. However, her face was visibly chubby, sporting a round face complete with a double chin. She kind of resembled a caricature, so her overall look she gave off was cute, at most.

"Is… is there a mop for me?" She asked, revealing her Irish voice.

"You can take mine. I'm not using it." Nathan offered.

"Thanks." She smiled, taking the handle from him. "But what're you doin?"

"Oh, I've got an important job." Nathan lifted up the single bucket filled with water.  
"I'm guarding the bucket."

"That translates to _he's doing fuck-all. _He's Nathan, by the way. I'm Curtis, that's Simon, Kelly

"Hiya." Kelly nodded.

"And Alisha."

"Hi." She said.

"Oh, h-hi everyone. I'm Andrea." The girl introduced.

"So what're you in fer? Sucking cock in public 'cause, like, who hasn't been there, right Alisha?"

Curtis immediately punch Nathan in the arm.

"Ow!"

"No, nothin' like that. I got caught with drugs." She admitted.

"Oh, me too! We have so much in common." Nathan smirked.

"The drugs weren't mine. They were my brother's. But I just… didn't want him to go to jail again. So, what's a few hours of community service for a member of the family?"

"So, you're into that family shit. I can respect that. Do you want a family?" Nathan smiled, placing his arm around her neck playfully.

"Well, I guess someday."

"I'll just let you know I'm more than happy to assist in the—" He got interrupted by Kelly.

"Okay. Nathan. You, me, over there. Now." She demanded.

"Ooh, Kelly. Taking charge. I like a little dominance in my women."

She grabbed him by the arm and led him away from the group.

"The fuck you doin?" She asked.

"I thought I was being clear. I'm sorry perhaps you misheard me. I am. Trying. To. Get. Laid." He said slowly.

"But you said all that stuff before you saw her."

"Yeah, and I know she looks a little _ugh _but I also said I like a big-tittied woman and hers are _ginormous._"

"You're disgusting."

"No, I'm desperate. There's a difference."

"What if she kills you? One wrong move in bed and—"

"Death by sex! What a way to go!"

"Nathan! I'm serious!"

"Kelly! I'm immortal! I think you're just jealous of a fat girl. Just because she has folds doesn't mean she can't get me hard. It'll take way more than that to put this python down."

"Whatever. You do what you want you… gross, disgusting, shithead."

"Cheers to you too, love." He winks.

They both returned to the group and he made his way straight to Andrea.

"You alright?" She asked Nathan.

"Me? Oh, yeah. Peachy. What about you? Are you alright?"

The group rolled their eyes.

"Y-yeah. I'm fine." She smirked. "So, I take it you're the troublemaker in this group."

"Well, you know what they say. Girls can't resist a bad boy."

Andrea chuckled, "Oh yeah? Then why are you going after me and not these two ladies that've been here longer?"

"Actually, it's pretty easy to resist him. All you need is at least one brain cell and you're good." Alisha informed.

"Jury's spoken. I don't think I'm stupid so…"

"No! Neither do I! In fact, I think you're smarter than all these butterfaces put together!"

"Oi, you prick." Curtis punched the teen in the arm again.

"Okay! Alisha is not a butterface. She's just a little moody." Nathan raised his hands in defense "Which isn't a bad thing! Look Andrea- beautiful name by the way. These two have _very _high standards."

"And you think I don't?"

"Well, no? But you could do a lot worse than me, right?" He shrugged.

"I guess you're right. I'll meet you here at tonight. I'm gonna go check the cleaning room for another mop so we all can clean."

"You're an angel."

The girl gingerly placed her mop down on the ground and slowly walked away.

Nathan, as soon as she left, fell into his chair fist-bumped the air. "Fuck yes! I'm getting' shagged to-night!"

"You're such a dick." Kelly told him.

Curtis approached the boy.

"What? You're gonna punch me in the arm again?"

Curtis grabbed the bucket of water beside Nathans chair and proceeded to dump it all on him.

"Hey!" Nathan yelled.

"Stop. Being. A. Prick."

Nathan stood up, dripping wet "Oh, that's how it is, eh? All you lot teaming up on me. I thought you all liked me."

"I like you." Simon muttered.

"Barry no offence but your vote doesn't really count. But thanks for participating."

Alisha smirked. "Nathan. We've known that Andrea girl ten seconds and we already like her more than you."

"Wow. I'll remember that." The teen began to make his leave.

"Oi, where're you going?" Curtis yelled.

"_Someone _drenched me with water. I'm going to the locker room to dry off. Any problems? Good."

After the boy was out of sight, Curtis sighed.

"Fuck, he's such a dick."

"Yeah." Kelly nodded. "Poor girl. Doesn't know what she's gettin' into."


	2. Chapter 2

Nathan whistled his way to the locker room but paused when he heard Andrea's voice.

"I can't talk right now. Really. I'm gonna get in trouble. Please. I don't know where the bloody remote is! I never watch the telly! Please, I need to go. Yes, I'll see you at home. Yeah, I'll head home after this. Okay. Bye."

The boy leaned in the doorway and grinned. "Domestic dispute? Because, you know, I don't mind being the _other man_ I'd just like to be told beforehand."

"What?" She asked, placing her phone back in her locker. "It's not like that."

"Oh? It sounded a lot like he wants to be with you." Nathan made a heart with his hands "forever"

"That's the problem. He always wants to know where I am 24/7." She sighed, taking a seat on a bench.

He rolled his eyes "yeah, that's typically what boyfriends do, sweetie."

"What? No, Nathan. I was talking to my brother."

He paused. "The drugs one?"

A nod "The drugs one."

"Oh. Well in that case he sounds like a right prick."

"Yeah," she nodded, "kind of is. But whatever. What can you do?"

"Does he live with you?"

She scratched the back of her neck, "Uhm… for now. He's crashing on my couch. Parents kicked him out about a month ago."

"Oh. Was it 'cause of the drugs?" He asked in a pretty condescending tone.

"Yeah, it was _'cause of the drugs_" She mimicked.

"Having him there'll be a little difficult to deal with tonight when we go to your place."

She paused. "Who said we're going to my place?"

Nathan smiled, "I'm just doing a best-case scenario thing here."

"You actually want _me _to sleep with you?"

"Well, I'm not going to sleep with myself."

She crossed her legs. "We can always go back to your place."

"Technically you already are. Welcome to my humble abode."

She furrowed her brows, "when I said I'd meet you here later tonight, I didn't know that you lived here."

"Yeah, I know. It surprises everyone." He sat himself beside her.

"Uhh, Nathan. Why're you wet?"

"Isn't that my line for you?" He smiled.

"Charming."

"I got a bucket dumped on me. Gross mop water, too."

"You probably deserved it." She chuckled.

"Yeah, oh well." Nathan shrugged. "Comes with the territory. You know. We _are _all alone right now. And I do have to take this jumpsuit off. With me being all wet and all."

"Your point?"

"Well we don't have to wait for tonight to get the fun going." He said, standing up and placing a hand on his jumpsuit zipper.

Andrea began to laugh, "Man! If I had that confidence."

"Eh, it's more desperation, really." He smiled and wiggled his hips.

"Oh! I'm sorry you're so desperate that you have to stoop this low!"

"You can make it up to me." He began to unzip his suit.

"Yeah, I guess I can." She approached him and rezipped his jumpsuit. "But that'd be spoilers."

Then she made her leave at a casual pace.

"I don't mind spoilers! I had a mate tell me Snape killed Dumbledore and I didn't mind! Honestly! I'd settle for a five-finger slippy! That wouldn't spoil... oh, well." He sighed. "Guess beggars can't be choosers, Nathan."


	3. Chapter 3

Nathan was hanging outside the community centre. He was in normal street clothes and smoking a cigarette.

He looked to the sky, getting darker by the minute.

"That's a bad habit."

He turned around and saw Andrea in a casual spring dress and on her back was a pastel pink knapsack.

"Hiya." She waved.

He smushed the cigarette in the ground. "you look good."

"Same to you. Though I'm partial to the orange jumpsuit." She smiled. "Why're you out here? Were you waiting outside for me?"

"Erm, not exactly."

Andrea reached for the handle of the door and tried to pull it open but it wouldn't barge.

"You're kidding me? You're locked out?"

"Yeah. Usually the probation worker isn't competent enough to remember to lock it."

"Unbelievable." She shook her head.

"Night's still young. And my standards are very low, we can even go at it right here, right in public. We're already criminals, what's another offense?"

Andrea chuckled. "No. No, I'm gonna treat this like a proper date."

"What, like dinner and a movie? Eat lobster and talk about how fucking awesome our lives are? I don't have any money, I'm on community service for fucks sake."

"I thought of that. We don't need money to have a good time." She took Nathan's hand and began to lead him to her car.

"You do need money to buy condoms."

"Alright you got me there." She smiled. "Come on, I'll take you somewhere special."

"Okay, that either leads to a murder dungeon or a sex dungeon and I pray to god it's the latter." He opened the passenger's door to the old family car.

"If you're lucky." She told him, attempting to start the engine.

"No offense lady, but your car is a piece of shit."

"Yeah, tell me about it." Finally, the engine began and she put the gearshift in reverse. "But I had to sell my new one, this is all I could afford."

"You sold your new car? For this fossil?"

"No, I. I needed money to bail out my brother." She admitted. "But, let's not talk about that. Reach into the front pocket of my knapsack, I chucked it in the back. There's a blindfold, I want you to put it on."

"Now we're talking." Nathan eagerly did as he was told. "You swear you're not gonna murder me?"

"If you keep being a sarcastic buttface maybe I will."

"Sarcastic buttface?" He laughed, putting on the simple black, blindfold. "You need to work on your insults."

She began to laugh too. They were sharing a laugh. An amazing sight to see. Two people laughing.

"Right, where am I?" He asked, extending his hands in the darkness.

"We're not there yet. Keep going." Andrea answered from behind him, her hands on his shoulders.

"But this is borrrinnngg!" Nathan whined.

"We're almost there. You baby." She chuckled.

"This better be worth it."

"I think it is." She smiled. "Alright. Stop. Take off your blindfold."

"Finally." He sighed. When he opened his eyes, he saw a small field that led to a very miniscule and empty duck pond. But the sight to behold was the clear moon reflected on the waters. Even though it was only a crescent moon, it was still a pretty scene.

"Alright, this is something." He nodded.

"Yeah. I discovered this place when I first moved here. Went for a run, took the wrong turn. And then… this." She smiled. "Nobody knows about this place."

"Wow. So, are we gonna do it in the water or on the field? Because I could go for a skinny-dip, I just don't know how sanitary that water is." He remarked.

"Don't be ridiculous." She huffed, reaching into the large pocket of her backpack. "I brought a blanket."

"You are smart." He said, grabbing her waist.

"Nathan. Just one moment." She told him. Andrea placed the blanket down and used the backpack as a weight. She sat down in the middle and stared out. "Come on, have a sit."

He rolled his eyes and sat beside her.

"Just look. Take it in. So calm. Peaceful." She grinned. Inhaling the tranquil air.

"Yeah. It's nice, I guess." He replied. After a little moment of silence, he cracked a smile. Giving in to the scenery.

"Alright." She turned to look at the boy beside her. As if a general giving an order, she said "Drop your pants."

"Now we're talking!" He exclaimed, eagerly unzipping his trousers.


	4. Chapter 4

In the middle of Andrea performing oral, her phone began to ring.

"Ignore it, don't stop." Nathan told her.

She glanced at the phone laying face-up on the blanket. The caller ID read KERMIT.

"Shit." She whispered after stopping her actions. "I have to take this."

"No! Come on, I didn't even finish." He complained.

"I know, I know! I'm sorry!" She answered her phone, "Kermit, what do you want? Yes, I popped out. I'm at the shops, Kermit! Yes, some shops _are _open later. You were asleep when I left, I didn't want to wake you. I don't! I don't know what time I'll be home! Just… fine. Go back to bed. I'm coming home now. But don't go in my room. I'm bringing a friend over. Damn it Kermit, I can bring home men if I want to it's my bloody flat!" She pressed the _end call _button quite aggressively.

"Well there goes our night." Nathan said, zipping his pants back up.

"It's just on pause. We're going back to my place." She began to pack up the items in the backpack.

"Look, I've been trying all day to screw around. And I got so close and then you, quite literally, blue balled me." He got himself up from the blanket. "I think it might be best if you just send me back to the community centre."

"Right, you mean the place you're locked out of?"

"Fuck. Right." He sighed.

"You can sleep in my room tonight. We can fool around if you want." She suggested.

"With a convict sleeping in the next room?" He shook his head. "We'll have a go, but if he tries to shank me with any sharp object I am out."

"Gotcha." She nodded, beginning to walk away with the backpack in hand.

"That includes his dick." Nathan reminded.

"Right. We'll lock the door."

"Oh. Right. Good."

Soon the two were walking side by side.

"Sorry to bring this up now but… Did you call him Kermit?" He asked.

"Yeah, that's his name. It's an Irish name."

"Let's be real, he's named after the frog."

She smiled, "best not talk about the frog around my brother. He has a bad relationship with him."

"I think he should forgive him. After all." Nathan began to chuckle "It's not easy being green."

Another burst of shared laughter.

"Yeah. I don't know why he's so angry all the time."

"Hey, that's none of my business." Nathan told her.

"You're right. I'm sorry. I just want to forget the world, you know? Just wish I could leave this place and fuck my brains out to forget life."

"Sounds like a plan. I'm free right now."

"You just want to get laid. You don't care if it's with me or some herpes-infested ten quid hooker."

"I do care. I'd choose you every time. Number one: I don't want herpes. Number two: I don't have ten quid. You're free." He smiled.

Andrea stared at him in disbelief and began to laugh. "You're impossible!"

Some more laughter from the two.

While walking to the car, Nathan reached for her hand.

"This night went a lot different than I expected." He admitted.

"Well, it's not over yet." She said, opening her car door.


	5. Chapter 5

Andrea's car parked in front of her flat. This particular section of homes was arranged like a condo/townhouse complex with an arranged car park and flats close together. For hers, she lived in more of a condo, being one storey, and on the second floor. It was a nice place to live. A porch overlooking the cars, a communal garden.

From the car, she glared at her balcony. "Let me go in first. When I give you the signal, go over to the garden, I'll get my ladder ready."

"Your ladder? Do you do this a lot?" Nathan asked, getting out of the passenger's side.

"Only since Kermit moved in." She shook her head and joined him outside the car, "Just look onto the balcony. I'll be there soon as I can."

* * *

When inside, she was greeted by a bald man nearing his thirties sitting on the well-used sofa watching football. In his hand was a kitchen knife that he was sharpening while his eyes were glued to the telly.

"What's that?" Andrea asked him.

"Knife." He responded nonchalantly.

"What happened to your switchblade?" She rubbed the back of her arm.

"Lost it."

She nodded, "Oh. Okay. H-have fun. With the… sports."

"Thought you said you was bringing a friend over."

"What? Oh yeah. Um. Didn't work out." She smiled.

"Good. Would be gross to think of someone getting it on with you."

"Because I'm your sister." She chuckled.

Kermit took his eyes off the TV and looked at her. Examining her feet to her head. Then he replied. "Sure."

She dipped her head down and made her way to the porch. Once there, she waved her hands to get the attention of a smoking Nathan. He crushed his cigarette and headed to the garden.

"I'm goin to sleep. And I'm locking my door." She told her brother.

"Why?"

"B-because if I wake up earlier than you, I want to stop myself from waking you up. You can let me know when you're awake by knocking on my door and telling me to make brekkie. That's when I'll unlock my door. Heh." She smiled.

"Okay." He went back to his show.

She walked into her bedroom and locked the door behind her, giving herself a moment of peace by taking a deep breath. Then, she opened her closet and took out a metal ladder, she dropped it down to Nathan who proceeded to extend it until it reached close to her window.

He climbed up with little hesitation and the two folded the ladder when they were both safely inside Andrea's room.

Here, Nathan got a chance to look how she decorated her bedroom and overall, it was simplistic. Her rustic queen bed had a post with four poles, there was a shelf with various achievement awards, and beside her closet was a full-length standing mirror.

"Wow, going for the plain approach?" He asked.

"Well, most of my stuff is at my parents house in Ireland, the stuff I brought here with me was out in the living room but now they're in boxes."

"Why?"

"Kermit doesn't like girly things." She shook her head. "Least I still have my pink rose garden pillowcase and blanket."

"Oh yes, at least you still have two items in a room nobody sees." He sighed.

"Yeah. You're right. She sat on her bed. "It's hard, you know?"

"Just stand up to him. Give 'im hell." Nathan suggested.

"Yeah, no thanks. Why don't you do that? I'll be sure to say nice things at your funeral."

"He wouldn't actually kill me… right?"

She shrugged. "If he's angry enough. I don't know what he'd do."

"Jesus, girl." Nathan laid down on the bed, beside Andrea. "you have to do something."

"I will." She closed her eyes. "I will. I just wish it wasn't me that had to do it. Wouldn't it be nice to just dump all your problems on someone else? Take a vacation while someone else deals with your shit?"

"People'd pay good money for that." Nathan joked. "Could make it an industry."

"Yeah. But that only happens in the films. Nah." She sighed. "Everyone is stuck being themselves. Living out their boring stories while others get glories and fame."

"Hey, that was pretty good. You do poetry or something?" He asked.

She gazed at her _outstanding achievement in Poetry Slam 2017 _award with a giant pencil as the trophy. "Yeah."

"Cool." Nathan mumbled as he tucked himself into the covers. "Cool. Drool. Fool. Rule. Tool. I can do it too."

Andrea looked over beside her. Nathan had drifted off to sleep. She smirked and shook her head. While he slept, she spent her time out of the blanket. Staring at the wall. Until she also made her way to dreamland.


	6. Chapter 6

Andrea woke up, peacefully. Her eyes fluttering as she heard the birds chirping. She looked to her left to see the window wide open. Then she turned to her right to find nothing beside her, except a note labelled _NATHAN_. She sat up in the bed, opened the paper and read:

**Dear Nathan,  
I don't know how but we got swapped.  
When I woke up, I was looking at myself sleeping and it freaked me the fuck out. It didn't take me long to realize I now look like you.  
So, I took your mobile and climbed down the ladder.  
I then took down the ladder so you wouldn't follow me.  
I'm sorry.  
Don't hate me, please.  
Also, make Kermit his brekkie and ****don't make him angry****.  
I left you my phone, I'll call you later.  
-Andrea.**

"What the fuck? She can't be serious." She moved the piece of paper and stared at her chest. "Oh she is fucking serious."

Andrea made her way to the mirror and inspected herself. "Whoa. This is so weird. On so many levels. How the fuck?... Oh shit! She has powers! That's what she was talking about last night! This was her plan all along! And I fell for it! Like a chump! All for sex! With her! God, I'm a fecking idiot!"

She ran over to the window and looked out "Where the fuck are you, Andrea?"

* * *

Nathan was chilling in a hot tub in a public swimming pool, paddling his feet.

An attractive twenty-something in a lifeguard bathingsuit approached him.

"Nice swim trunks. Usually guys don't go for pastels." She smiled.

"T-thanks, I just got 'em like ten minutes ago."

"It's a bit early for a swim, eh? Most people that're here are usually little kids doin' lessons."

"Is that why you're here?" He asked.

"Yeah, I teach level 2's. Next lesson is in fifteen." She sat beside him. "I'm Olivia."

"I'm And…y. Andy." He shook her hand. "Nice to meetcha."

"Yeah, same." She sighed. "So. What brings you here? You ain't one of them pedophiles that comes here to spy on the children, right?"

"What! No!"

Olivia smiled, "Relax, I'm just joking. Why are you here?"

He sighed, "To tell you the truth, I haven't been swimming in maybe ten years? Maybe more?"

"What? Why? Swimming's fun!" She said, slashing her feet.

"I know. I used to love it. But, and especially when the pool is absolutely filled with people. It takes its toll. Just looking at all these beautiful people in bikini's and the smallest bathing suits you can find. Flaunting what they got. And some of them don't mean to. And I get it. But… I don't know, it just feels like everyone's taunting me." He cleared his throat. "But, that was before I looked like this."

"Oh? What changed? Because I think you look right fit." Olivia smiled, checking his out.

"I lost some weight." He nodded. "So, I'm doing all the things I couldn't do before. And maybe, while the day is still young, I can get sweets with nobody staring at me."

She shook her head. "Well, people might still stare at you."

He paused in shock, "Why?"

"You'd be eating sweets at nine in the morning." She giggled.

Nathan shrugged, "I'm on a bit of a time crunch. I've gotta go do community service soon."

"Wait, what?" She asked.

Nathan smiled as he walked out of the tub, "Don't worry, it wasn't for being a pervert or anything."

"Oh, good." She sighed.

"It was for drugs." He chuckled.

"That's not better!" She yelled after him.


	7. Chapter 7

Andrea was pacing in her room, biting her nails, chanting "I've got to get the fuck out of here, I've got to get the fuck _out of here_!" She stopped in front of the mirror again and looked down at her night shirt, which Andrea had changed herself into at some point during the night.  
"Well, I'm not in a big hurry. I wonder if she has any toys."

She opened the closet and began rustling through every drawer inside, "Come on you little bastard, every girl has a vibrator or two. Where the fuck are ya?"

There was a knocking at the door. "Andrea! I'm awake!"

"Good for you, mate." She mumbled to herself.

"Andrea! I want brekkie!"

"Leave me alone." Another grumble.

"Andrea!" The knocks became bangs on the door.

"Alright! Fuck!" She looked at herself again in the full-body mirror. "Just a quick peak wouldn't hurt, eh?"

She unbuttoned her pyjama shirt and revealed her bare breasts.

"Oh, shit." She took off her shirt entirely and examined herself in the mirror. "Fuck yeah, maybe this power isn't so bad." She cupped her chest with both hands and began playing around. But something made her stop.

Cuts and bruises all over her arms and shoulders.

"Fuck, girl. What did you do to yourself?"

"ANDREA!" Another yell.

"Jesus!" She turned to face the door and that's when she saw something in the mirror that caused her to be frightened.

"Christ."

* * *

Nathan walked in the community centre to see Simon and Curtis waxing the floors.

"Finally!" Curtis yelled, wiping the sweat from his forehead. "Where you been?"

"I-i overslept. Sorry." He told them.

"Right. And where's your girlfriend?"

"Wha— A-Andrea? She's... home. Sick. You, know." He scratched the back of his neck.

"Well, better tell the girls their third garbage-picker ain't joining them." Curtis said, stopping the waxing machine. "That's your go, now."

"M-me?"

"Yeah. You have to do actual work. What a concept." Curtis rolled his eyes and exited the building.

Nathan paused and looked at the machine "But, I have no idea how to use that thing."

"I can use it. I've been watching him." Simon muttered.

"Really? You think you can do it?" Nathan smiled.

"I mean, maybe. I've been being his spotter so you can just take my old job." Simon explained.

Nathan placed a hand on Simon's shoulder, "Thanks, mate. I owe ya."

Simon looked puzzled at the lack of an insult but just shrugged it off. He began to operate the waxing machine with Nathan giving an extra pair of hands.

"I'm a prick, aren't I? I mean, to you specifically. Lookit you. The shy one. Just wants to fade into the background. Fade into the world. I know what that's like."

"Are you alright, Nathan?"

He nodded, "Never been better. Well, not in every area. My lungs. Should really give up the fags."

Simon stopped the waxer, "Did you hit your head last night or something?"

"No, I spent the night with Andrea. She taught me a lot of things. How I should be nicer. How I should be thankful for being skinny. For being liked. I'm telling ya. The old Nathan is gone. Never coming back, trust me." He placed a hand on Simons shoulder and looked at him straight in the eye.

"Don't hear the machine working." Curtis said as he entered the room.

"Curtis, Nathan is—"

"Fuck, what's going on, now?"

Simon mumbled, "Nathan's different."

"Yep. No more sarcastic twatface. I'm turning a new leaf." The boy smiled.

"That's what you said when you shagged up with that Catholic girl. You know, the one only into Catholic boys." Curtis shook his head.

"It's not like that. Look, I'm serious. I'm starting over." He extended his hand. "I'm Nathan."

Simon looked at his hand, confused. "S-Simon."

"...Curtis."

"Nice to meet you lot. Now, I'll go outside and introduce myself to the girls. Ta."

When Nathan was entirely out of the room, Curtis looked at Simon. "That... was fucking mental"


	8. Chapter 8

Andrea didn't even get a chance to leave her room, as soon as she opened the door, she was being barked at. "Andrea where's my brekkie?"

"Uhm, what do ya want?" She slipped through the barely-open door.

"Stop playing games. You said you locked your door to not wake me up. However, you were cursing so god damn much that it woke me up. And now I want my sausages and potatoes. And make me some tea, too as payback for interrupting my dream." The bald, tattooed man ordered.

"Oh, well I'm sorry if your dream got cut short. I was also having a dream, then it ended. Kind of is what happens when you wake up." She joked.

"Why the fuck are you acting like that?" Kermit asked, approaching his sister in a hostile manner.

"Whoa! Somebody owes a quid to the swear jar." She said in a sing-song way.

"Get my fucking brekkie ready you piece of shit." He grabbed her shirt by the collar.

"Listen, I'll make you breakfast if you stop calling it "brekkie" that is absolutely childish. Brekkie. What kind of—" Her comments here cut short by a punch to the side of the head.

"Holy shit you hit me. Oh my god, my ear is ringing."

"Yeah. Now do what I told you and maybe I won't have to do it again." He walked back to his sofa where the kitchen knife from earlier sat, now glimmering from the sunlight shining through the window.

She barely had time to start the stove when the room was filled with the sound of her mobile ringing.

"Who is it?" Kermit asked from the couch.

**INCOMING CALL: NATHAN **

"It's um, the community centre. Wanting to know why I'm not there." She lied.

"Shit. Tell them you're sick or something. You can leave after I get my brekkie." He told her, going back to the telly.

Andrea nodded and entered her room.

"Where the fuck are ya, Andrea?" She asked, quietly yet harshly.

"Um…" Nathan looked around the tiled floor, urinals and cubical. "The toilets at the community centre."

"The toilets at—you left me here! Left me here with the Muppet baby." She told her through the phone. "It's not bad enough you intentionally tricked me to steal my body but you—"

An interruption from Nathan, "Hold on, I did what? This isn't not my fault!"

"Well it sure as hell ain't my fault!"

"Oh, yeah, right. If I had the power to switch bodies don't you think I woulda done it with someone my own gender?" He said quietly, even though he was the only one in the bathroom.

"I don't know, maybe you're a pervert!" She exclaimed.

"No, Nathan that's you. You did this! You had to have!"

"It can't be me! I already have a power!" Andrea threw herself on the bed.

"What? What the fuck is your power?"

She grinned, "I'm immortal!"

"Oh, bullshit!"

"Really! Come over here right now and kill me!" She suggested.

"I'd love to, really. But I don't know if our powers swapped with our bodies or not." Nathan sighed.

"Swap us back you-you witch!" Andrea punched a pillow.

"Oh, please."

She hid her face in the punched-in pillow. "I was perfectly happy. Perfectly content."

"Oh yeah, that's why you wanted me to get you off."

"No shit! I was sexually!" She realized her tone and turned it into a whisper. "I was sexually frustrated. It happens."

"Then you thought I'd be easy!" Nathan exclaimed.

"Well, to be perfectly honest, yeah! I mean, look at you, and look at me!" She glared at herself into the mirror.

"So that's it. The truth comes out. Have fun as a girl, Nathan. Because there's no way we're switching back." He said right into the mic of the phone. "You should know, I'm lactose intolerant and you might want to start googling menstrual cramps and how to soothe them. I'm due next week. Tootles."

Andrea looked at her phone to see the CALL ENDED signal. She sighed. "Tootles."


	9. Chapter 9

Alisha ran into the community centre and approached Curtis "We need to talk."

They entered the locker room in a hurry. "Alisha, what's this about?"

"Nathan." She said in all seriousness.

"Yeah, he's been weird all day." Curtis sat on the bench.

She shook her head, "No, it's not like that. He wanted to start himself over so he introduced himself and shook Kelly's hand then my hand."

"Shit. What fucked up sex thing did he say to you?"

"Nothing! He said nothing, Curtis!" Alisha exclaimed.

"What!" Curtis stood in shock "Alisha that's impossible."

"I know! I have no idea why it didn't work. I was prepared to hear some real sick things from him. But nothing. He just smiled and walked away." She began pacing with anxiety.

"Well why did you shake his hand in the first place?"

She threw her hands in the air, "I don't know, wanted to prank him as a payback for yesterday."

"Yeah, he was a bastard yesterday." Curtis mumbled.

"What's gotten into him?" She sat beside her boyfriend.

Kelly and Simon walked into the locker room "We need to talk about Nathan."

"Where is Nathan?" Curtis asked.

"Taking a piss." Kelly answered.

* * *

Nathan was still in the mens toilets, this time at a urinal with his trousers unzipped. "God, this is so much easier as a boy. Aah."

* * *

"He touched me, and my power didn't work on him." Alisha shared.

Simon spoke up. "He was nice to me. Called me his mate."

"Alright, I know how to settle this. Be sure he actually turned a new leaf and isn't brainwashed. I'm gonna read his mind. Gimme a mo." Kelly left the locker room.

* * *

Kelly caught Nathan just as he exited the mens room. "Whoa! Kelly! You startled me."

She looked at him up and down. "Who are ya?"

"What? W-What're you talking about?" He smiled nervously.

"You were just thinking how you're loving being Nathan. Now, I know he's self cantered, but I also know he doesn't think about himself in the third person. Who the fuck are ya?" She backed him up against the wall of the hallway and visibly frightened him.

"Wait a minute." Nathan mumbled, "You can read minds?"


	10. Chapter 10

Nathan sat in the locker room with all four misfits staring him down.

"You're Andrea?" Curtis asked.

"Yeah."

"Since when?" Kelly joined in the interrogation.

"Uhm, this morning. We just sort of… woke up as each other." He explained.

"What did you do as Nathan?" Kelly interrogated again.

"I didn't do anything wrong, okay? I just went to a swimming pool, bought a fecking doughnut, then came here. Alright? This isn't my fault. I'm the victim here." He insisted.

"Then what Nathan?" Kelly replied.

"He didn't do anything as me."

"Where is he?" Alisha asked.

"He's at my house. Well, my flat. He's there with my brother… the drugs one." He told them.

"Is he okay?" Kelly said.

"Yeah, he should be. If he followed everything, I told him."

"I know you haven't known us long, but Nathan and rules don't really mix." Curtis informed him.

"Look, I'll call him. Okay? He has my mobile. Just a quick call, I'll even put it on speaker." Nathan suggested.

"Do it." Kelly nodded.

He pulled out his mobile from his jumpsuit pocket and it began to ring.

"Hallo?" A quiet reply from the other end.

"Hey, Nathan, how goes it?"

"I'm in your closet." A whisper.

"Okay. Why?" Nathan looked at the other misfits nervously.

"Oh, just wanted to see your fancy dress."

"See, he's having fun." He assured the group.

An exclaim from the other end, "I'm taking the piss, obviously. Your brothers a fucking psycho."

"Uh, what's wrong?" Asked Nathan.

"Oh, well, you know, he beat the shit outta me and now he wants to finish the job with a fucking knife. That man is Jack from The fucking Shining. Get me the hell out of here!" Pleas from Andrea.

"Oh, shit. Yeah, he does that sometimes. The closet isn't the best place to go though. I mean, unless you locked the door. Don't he'll simmer down in a few hours."

"Oh. A few hours, isn't that fucking _lovely!_"

"Well, you locked the door, right?"

"Fuck!" She opened the closet door and threw the phone on the bed.

"Alright, I'm on my way." Nathan assured as he pressed END CALL.

Just as Andrea was about to lock her door, she saw the knob turning and ran back into the closet.

Kermit entered the room in a white muscle tee and carrying his favourite knife. He looked around the room and then noticed the open window. He found the phone on the bed and picked it up, then he closed the window and locked it.

"Andrea, I know you're in here. But instead of wasting my time and energy going after you, I'll wait for you to go after me. Once I hear your footsteps on the floor, you're mine. You're gonna have to come to the kitchen to eat, I know you. That's your favourite spot isn't it? You call me Kermit the fucking frog?" He stabbed the closet door, inches from Andrea's face, then he took the knife away. "Then you're Miss. Fatass piggy. Oink oink, you worthless shit."

He left the room with a slam of the door.

Andrea sighed heavily from holding her breath, "He can't take a joke, can he? God, this is not the way I pictured dying. I mean, not nearly at all. Fuck."


	11. Chapter 11

Nathan stood up from the bench, "Sounds like he's in a little trouble. Doesn't sound so serious. My brother is scary, not a murderer. So whoever is good at sneaking around should go with me. Figure out a plan to get him out of there so my brother can calm down."

"Why do _you_ want to rescue him?" Alisha asked.

"Look, I didn't do this! This is not my fault! But whatever happens, I don't want him hurt! I'm a human being for Christ's sake, I have feelings. Plus, he's not a bad guy. He doesn't deserve whatever my brother's done to him. We need someone to sneak past my brother and make sure Nathan is okay. I can set up the ladder to my room and that's how he'll escape." Nathan planned.

"I'll go with you." Simon volunteered.

Kelly nodded, "Yeah, thats a good idea, Simon."

"Are you sure you're good at sneaking?" Nathan placed his hands on the boys shoulders.

"Yeah, I can... I can sort of go... invisible." Simon admitted.

"Does everyone have fucking powers?" Nathan asked.

The group collectively nodded and shrugged.

"You know, yesterday I'd be shocked by that. But yesterday I wasn't a curly haired Irish boy so, whatever I'll accept anything. Let's go, inviso-boy." He and Simon exited the locker room and made their way to Andrea's car.

"Hide in your room all you like, sis. As soon as I hear you come out, you're dead!" Andrea heard from inside the closet. She was in a fetal position with the only light source being the small cracks in the bottom of the door (and the large chunk thanks to Kermit's knife) she sighed heavily.

"Jesus Christ. The anger is strong with this one... I'm gonna die here. I can't escape him. I have more surface area than I'm used to, if I try to dodge him... fuck, I'm no Ninja. I can't escape a man with a fucking serial killer knife. God, living with this monster, I understand why Andrea is so unhealthy. Probably ate her pain away. Or just bad genetics. But to be fair, I'd still do her."

She began to bite her fingernails, "Right, keep talking talking Nathan. Keep talking so you don't go insane... what's some plus sides to being a girl? Well I can think of two. Right here." She cupped her breasts again.

"Ha ha! Heh. This isn't as much fun when you're the complete opposite of horny. I wonder if Andrea whacked it as me. I guess she did. I mean, who wouldn't? I honestly don't know how to feel about that. This is too weird. Fuck, why did she have to knock down that damn ladder? I could always call 999 but... Hey Kermit, do you have my phone?"

"Yep." He yelled to her.

"Shit… Good call, buddy! I'm screwed. Totally screwed. Now would be a really good time to wake up from this dream, eh? Or maybe have Ashton Kutcher jump out like that dumb American show. Anyone? Help?" She buried her head into her knees.

Without her noticing, the closet door slowly opened, but there was nobody in sight.

"I'm here, Nathan."

She jerked her head up, "Ashton Kutcher?"

"What?"

"God?" She asked, looking up.

It answered, "What? No, Nathan, it's Simon."

"Who?"

"... Barry."

She grinned and looked around, "Barry! Oh man am I glad to see you... where are you?"

He replied, "Invisible."

She stood up and exited the closet. "Right. Cool. Oh! Wait! You called me Nathan! You know I'm Nathan! So that means—"

"Andrea told us everything. She's getting the ladder set up for us now."

"Fuck yeah! Get me the hell out of here." Andrea made her way to the window.

"Ladder's set up. Let's go." Nathan yelled from the garden.

"Ladies first, so, after you Barry." Andrea smiled and motioned to nothing.

"Gee, thanks." He said.

"And now this nightmare comes to an—"

Suddenly, Andrea was thrown onto the bed with a knife shoved in her face, Kermit began tying her to her bed poles with some rope.

She sighed, "Oh, come on, frog-man! Lay off me!"

"You and your sass, Andrea. I'm sick of it. Day after day it's backtalk after backtalk. You're the younger sibling, you need to show some respect!" He ordered while tying.

She took a deep breath. "Okay, okay I'll respect you from now on. Okay? Just let me go. Please."

He finished tying her arms, and moved to the legs. "You need to be taught a lesson."

"Lesson? God damn it. You have some sort of god complex or something, you know." She shook her head.

"Respect your elders, respect the men."

Andrea chuckled, "Hey nobody respects being a man more than me, okay?"

"More sass. You're making me do this. You're supposed to love family, Andrea. But you can't love. And you'll never be loved." He threatened, pointing the knife tip right about the spot where Andrea's heart is.

"Bit rich coming from—"

By the time Nathan got himself up the ladder, the scene he saw was Kermit standing over Andrea with the knife near her heart. So, concerned, he yelled out "Nathan!"

Unfortunately, that startled Kermit enough to accidentally plunge the kitchen knife into her chest. Not the full length of the blade, but enough to do serious damage, even if Kermit did immediately take it out of her chest.

Nathan ran to the injured girl, "Kermit! You killed him!"

"I-I didn't mean to. You startled me and it just... it just happened. I only wanted to scare her. Honest." Kermit stepped away and, although he was telling the truth, he wasn't ready for the responsibility.

"Nathan, Nathan, please." While Kermit talked, Nathan had untied her arms, he was aiming for untying the legs but he knew he didn't have the time.

She shook her head. "God, I hate this part. Hey, Andrea. If this is it. Like, _really_ it. Don't let this douchebag get away with this. Okay? And keep up my Greek god figure. And, and I give you permission to wank the weasel every now and then. Or whenever, really."

Nathan began tearing up, "Don't go, Nathan."

"Why're you calling her Nathan?" Kermit asked.

He yelled at the man, "Shut up! Nathan, please."

"Well. That's that. See ya on the other side." Andrea smiled, then it ceased. And slowly, her eyes closed.

Nathan quickly untied Andrea's legs and knelt at her bedside again. "Nathan."

Andrea awoke with a gasp, "Oh thank god. Thank God!"

Nathan flinch in shock, "Nathan!"

"In the flesh, well.." Andrea sat up in the bed, then looked at herself again.

"That means I really do have the bodyswap power." Nathan stood up from the bed. He eyed Andrea's poetry trophy.

"That's what I've been telling you!" Andrea exclaimed.

"I've got an idea." He said, then whacked Kermit upside the head with the trophy, causing him to black out. 

A knocked-out Andrea had her arms tied behind a plastic chair in the community centre.

"How long do you think this'll take?" Kelly asked the group who surrounded the girl.

"However long she needs." Nathan answered.

"Guy must be the absolute worst, huh?" Curtis commented.

"Worst than Nathan?" Alisha added.

"Yeah, Alisha. Worse than Nathan. Much worse." Nathan replied, in an uncharacteristically serious way.

* * *

Kermit was driving Andrea's car and pulled over when he saw some policemen on the side of the road doing checks.

He approached the police car and began talking to the driver.

"Hello my name is Kermit McCleod. I'm turning myself in for being in possession of a fuckton of cocaine and blaming it on my sister, also of abusing my sister and well, entire family for years, attempted murder of my sister, and also, threatening a police officer." He then raised his favourite kitchen knife (now covered in blood thanks to Andrea/Nathan) and smiled sweetly.

* * *

Andrea woke up violently, "What the fuck! Untie me! Who the hell are you people! Where's my sis…" She fluttered asleep again and awoke quite peacefully "Hm? Oh hey guys... I did it. He's gone. Can someone untie me?"

"On it." Nathan volunteered and once he was done untying her arms the two looked at eachother and embraced.

"I'm sorry." Andrea whispered.

"It's fine. It's over." He whispered "it's over."

The other misfits watched this scene confused.

"We should go, give them space." Kelly told the lot.

Curtis nodded and everyone followed Kelly out of the locker room so Nathan and Andrea could have a moment.

"What do we do now?" Nathan asked.

"Well, since you stayed over at my place last night. I guess I should stay at your place tonight." She smiled.

Nathan raised his eyebrow.


	12. Chapter 12

The two were sat, facing each other with a pile of playing cards between them. Around them are a few wrappers from the vending machine, and a couple bottles of beer.

"Aces?" Nathan asked, looking at the cards in his hands.

She shook her head "go fish."

He picked up a card from the pile.

"God, today was weird wasn't it? Kings?"

Nathan replied "Yeah, that's an understatement. Go fish."

She reached for a card from the pile "You uhm… you didn't do anything, you know, sexual, as me… right?"

"Didn't get the chance! Your brother tied me up to the bed right after breakfast." He exclaimed.

"Brekkie." She muttered

"So, if that counts as sexual then sure. Any sixes?"

She nodded

"What about you? Did you jerk off at least once?" He asked with a smile.

"Yeah." She told him, handing him a card.

He laid down two cards "What? Really?"

"Oh yeah. Yeah. One of the first things I did. Nines?" She responded, in a tone that could have been sarcastic.

"Wow. Don't know how I feel about that. That's not fair though! I was a complete gentleman through and through and—" The teen was interrupted.

"Couldn't find my toys then?" She asked.

"Checked every drawer." He sighed.

"Did you check under my mattress?"

"Fuck." He complained, passing her a card.

"Thanks. You know, I still owe ya from that botched attempt at sex yesterday. Did ya wanna retry?" Andrea laid down two cards.

"Normally I'd say yes but I'm in the middle of a riveting game of Go Fish." He chuckled. "Nah, actually I want to know more about what happened on this freaky Friday."

"It's Tuesday." She uttered.

"You know what I mean. What did you do as me?" Nathan raised a brow.

"It's your turn." She reminded him.

"Tens."

"Go fish."

He repeated. "Andrea, what did you do as me?"

"You know.." She mumbled, "All the stuff I can't do as me."

"Alright, so jack off and pee standing up is that it?"

"Well, no. I went swimming." She cleared her throat "Speaking of Jacks—"

"I don't own bathing shorts." He pointed out.

"You do now." She chuckled.

"What else did you do?"

"Ate some sweets." She answered

"Uh-huh. And you can't do those things now because?"

"Look, I don't want to be interrogated. All these questions. And you're just… you wouldn't get it. You don't know what it's like, Nathan. The stares. You learn to get a thick skin but… sometimes that's not enough." She sighed.

He nodded, "Yeah, I feel that."

"Yeah, right." She scoffed. "Nathan, I didn't feel any of that as you."

"So you didn't notice the dead-sexy men with six-pack abs?"

"No, not really. Just the hot babes in bikinis."

"Look." Nathan took a breath. "I can't believe I'm going to tell you this but… when I go to a beach of whatever, I notice the girls, of course I do. But I also notice the guys. The ones that should be on calendars and part of the Chippendales. The type that girls cream after. And I'm not like that. Too skinny. Too weird. We all have something, Andrea."

"Do you have any Jacks?" She smiled.

"Go fish."

She picked up a card, "But you're so confident, Nathan."

"I fake it!" He exclaimed. "Everyone fakes it. Sometimes I get lucky when girls choose me over some Hugh Jackman type. But I know it's because they have low self-esteem and they think I'm funny."

"I think you're funny." Andrea spoke up.

Nathan gave her a look.

"Oh." She said quietly.

"That was the point ain't it? Got a blowjob outa that."

Andrea scoffed "I didn't-I didn't give you a blowjob just because I think you're funny. You're attractive, Nathan."

"Well, you are too. In a caricature sort of way." He looked at his cards "Any tens now?"

"Still no." She sighed. "Man, being a human is fucked up."

"You can say that again." He reached for another card.

"Well, I must say I enjoy this Nathan much more than your buttprick persona." She laughed.

"Please tell me you didn't use those stupid insults as me. I couldn't imagine my glorious pipes saying something so kindergarten."

"Might've." She shrugged with a sly smile. "Any two's?"

He handed her a card.

"This is fun. More fun than I've had in… well, forever." She grinned. "If you want, we could still have a go at, well, you know."

He squinted at his cards. "It'd be weird, right? Because I was you. Could you imagine swapping with someone _then _having sex with them? That'd be fucked up. Eights?"

"Hey, some people are into some kinky shit." She smiled, handing him a card.

"You're telling me."

"You know, we could do that." She peered over her cards "If you want."

Nathan accidentally dropped his cards "Andrea, you're not serious! What the fuck? That sounds so! Oh… oh, you're not serious… thank god."

She began to laugh uncontrollably. "Just taking the piss! Oh! Your face!"

"You got me. I was starting to think you were fucked in the head." He shook his head.

"Aren't we all, though?" She smiled.

"I'll drink to that." Nathan reached over and grabbed two bottles. He passed one to Andrea and stared at the messed-up pile of cards in front of him "So much for our game."

"Eh, no big deal." Andrea took a drink "We were playing it wrong anyway."

"What're you going to do now that your brother's gone?" Nathan asked, gathering the cards.

"Well, after I'm done my community service, I guess I'll head home. Be with my parents. My mum got diagnosed with MS, that's why I wanted Kermit to stay with me. Didn't want him being a prick to her. So, I'll go live with them. Get the hell outta dodge and help out my mum as soon as I can. I miss her." She took another swig. "What about you? What are you doing after you're done with community service?"

Nathan laid down. "I don't know."

Andrea seemed a little taken aback. "Do you have any idea?"

Nathan shook his head, "go fish."

There was a pause between them and Andrea took this time to lay herself beside Nathan. She closed her eyes but Nathan's remained open, until he took a sigh and finally closed them.


	13. Chapter 13

Nathan woke up with a whimper and used his arm to feel beside him for his companion. When he felt no presence there, he opened his eyes and looked around.

"Andrea!" He yelled, "Ye better be takin' a piss! Andrea!"

He sat cross-legged in his spot. "That girl." He shook his head and noticed a piece of paper folded up like before.

"Is this the note from her house? What, have we swapped again?" He chuckled and unfolded the paper. This was a new note, he realized. The last note.

**Dear Nathan**  
** Sorry to do this in a one-night stand note but that's sort of my thing isn't it?**  
** I got a call early this morning that told me I don't need to do community service anymore since Kermit confessed. **  
** I'm free. **  
** And, I'm gonna go home. Back with my parents. The only reason I moved here was to escape my brother— yeah, that turned out well.**  
** So, now I think I'll go back. Maybe get some help. You know, for everything that shitface did to me. **  
** By the time you read this, it'll be too late. I'd be on my way back to Ireland. Back home to my mum and dad.**  
** I deleted your call history and my number from your phone. Actually, I did that back when I was you. I'm sorry. **  
** I say that a lot don't I? **  
** I need to leave this place. **  
** I do ask one thing of you. Go to the secret spot one last time for me. **  
** Brotherton Hill trail. When you see the tree that looks like he's flipping you off, turn left. Go through some bushes. And there it'll be. **  
** Take someone swimming. Don't be a pussy. **  
** Goodbye, Nathan. And thank you.**  
** Love, Andrea.**

"Is this a joke? You're joking? You wouldn't pull this shit twice, Andrea. Andrea!" checks phone, no dice "she really did it. She's gone."

* * *

Nathan, in his jumpsuit and ready to do his community service, sat on his folding chair. He read the letter again, but once he noticed Alisha and Curtis approach him he stuffed it in his pocket.

"Where's your girlfriend?" Curtis asked.

He looked at the boy, "How should I know? She's her own person. Could be having a shag-fest with Barry for all I know."

"Did something happen?" Alisha raised her brow.

"Yeah, we swapped bodies yesterday. That shit changes people." Nathan chuckled, "Now I have a new hatred for bras. Women should just ditch 'em. They hurt."

Alisha shrugged "Heh, maybe it wasn't a total loss after all."

"Nah." Curtis shook his head, "Probably the same ol' prick we know."

"And love." Nathan grinned.

Kelly walked into the picture, "Nathan, is that really you this time?"

"Really me, baby!" He opened his arms wide, "One hundred and ten percent!"

"Damn shame." Kelly smiled.

"You're telling me." Alisha joined.

"You lot are bullies you know that." Nathan pointed at the two.

"Who's a bully?" Simon asked, entering the community centre.

"Everyone!"

"Even me?" Simon mumbled.

"Especially you." Nathan said as he walked to the locker rooms to be alone. He didn't notice the paper fall from his pocket. But neither did the other Misfits either.

The probation worker, Shaun, approached the four with a sigh.

"Alright. I have to tell you lot… where's the fifth one?"

"Toilet." Kelly answered.

He shook his head, "Whatever. You can tell him when he gets back, I'm not saying it twice. You know the girl that joined us a few days back? She's not coming back. Unlike you all, she got an out. Someone else confessed. So she's free to leave. Not that you'd all care but I was just told to make an announcement or else I'd get a write-up. So… there. Announcement done. Now, all you need to grab rags and spray, you're cleaning the windows today."

With a nod, he left. The four didn't really know what to say. But as he exited, Kelly noticed the note dropped by Nathan.

"She's gone?" Alisha replied. "Poor Nathan. They got close didn't they?"

"I bet they did. It's not like she's gone gone, though. Nathan can still call her." Curtis nodded.

"No he can't." Kelly told the group. "Doesn't have her number. And she's not in London anymore. She's probably on a flight to Ireland by now. Hell, probably landed even. It's only an hour flight. But it's far enough."

"Wow." Curtis huffed. "Poor bloke didn't deserve that. Even if it is Nathan we're talking about."

"I'm going to talk to him." Kelly said, making her way to the locker room.

"Hiya." Kelly smiled as she sat beside the gloomy Nathan.

"Don't." He whispered.

"Don't what? I'm just saying hi." She defended.

"I see the note in your hand. I'm not stupid." He shook his head.

"I never said you were." Kelly admitted. "What're you feeling?"

"Honestly? I don't know. I just don't know why she'd just leave. No waking me up. No goodbyes. I've known her two days. And I was her for one of those days!" He exclaimed.

"So what? You were just using her for sex." Kelly pointed out.

"At first, yeah. But we never actually did it." He told her.

"What? You didn't have sex? I find that unbelievable." Kelly chuckled.

"I'm immortal. You can read minds. Why is me turning down sex unbelievable?" He sighed. "Not that I didn't have the chances. I just thought… all my relationships don't last. If you can even call 'em relationships. I wanted this one to be different."

"Do you think that's because you felt sorry for her? Because you lived her life for a day?" Kelly asked.

"Yeah, probably." Nathan rubbed his face. "I need to snap out of it."

"In the letter it says something about going to a secret spot. How about we head down there after we're done this bullshit of community service, huh?" Kelly smiled.

"Go with you?" Nathan nodded. "I could do worse."

She began to laugh "You're such a prick. Now come on, we're doing windows today."

"Goody. Windows." Nathan rolled his eyes.

"Wow, that tree really was flipping me off." Nathan commented as he whacked a tree branch away from him.

"Yeah, and it hasn't even met you yet." Kelly joked.

"YeAh, ANd iT HaSn'T EVEn MeT YoU YeT." Nathan mocked.

"You are so immature." She shook her head. "Are we there yet?"

"I think we need to go through this little opening here." He said, gesturing to a break in the bushes.

"Let's do it." Kelly agreed.

"Ladies first." Nathan replied.

"Oh, a gentleman." She rolled her eyes and stepped into the crevice. Once through, she saw the captivating scene of the sand and the water. "It's beautiful."

"Yeah, it is." Nathan nodded, appearing beside her once he was through.

"What do you wanna do first? you wanna skinny dip in the lake?" Kelly asked.

"No, actually. I just want to sit here. Watch the moon. The day go by." Nathan answered, sitting where he and Andrea sat before.

Kelly sat herself beside her friend. "Do you miss her?"

"I didn't think I would. But yeah. Yeah, I do." Nathan told her, staring out into the horizon.

"Why?"

"Fuck if I know." He shrugged.

Kelly smiled. "She got under your skin?"

"Fuck off." He gave the girl a side-glance.

"Oh come on, it was a good one."

"Yeah."

She sighed, "Well, if it means anything. I'm sorry. For everything that happened to you."

"Nah, nothing happened to me. It happened to her, every day of her life. I just died again. I didn't do anything." He shook his head.

Kelly cocked her head. "You can be real stoic when you're serious, Nathan."

Nathan turned to face her. "Would you rather me be a prick?"

"Nah. I'd rather have you be you." She smiled as she gazed at the moon hitting the water.

"Go fish." Nathan muttered as he too joined in the view of the waves glistening in the moonlight.


End file.
